Banks Like Us

In another strangely-twisted hour of creativity, Four Thousand Words has seen fit to butcher another world-class song for political imperative. Apologies in advance to any Bruce Springsteen fans.

Banks Like Us (to the tune of Bruce Springsteen's 'Born To Run')

In 2007 we hit a wall while chasing an American dream
We siphoned profit from the sub-prime market in a suicidal scheme
In just twelve months we'd loaned out more
Than the entire whole of the country's GDP
Millions or billions, it's all the same
When you're a poor man playing a rich man's game
And now everything's up for sale
Because banks like us, baby we were bound to fail.

Escalating property prices caused overconfidence
We channelled funds from East to West in a move that now looks dense
RBS, Lloyds TSB
We'll loan till we drop, our reserves could never run out
Wooooah, even Bradford and Bingley
And other stalwarts of UK plc
Well, now we know how it feels
When the homes are repossessed and the value just isn't real.

With the end of trust in the banking system
Borrowing is just too hard
Investment arms don't know what to do
And the fund managers are scarred
A run on the counters might be just too much
We've got no liquidity
We're dying in the shadow of Northern Rock
And we've crashed the economy

One, two, three...

We've billions in mortgage securities with a government guarantee
We've got three years to pay 'em back so you can raise my salary
Give me my bonus, whack up the charges
Show me who'll stop us, what are you going to do?
You can't let us fail, we're just too big
Too important to die so you'll just have to pay eight hundred billion pounds bail
So banks like us, baby can afford to fail
Because banks like us, we were always going to fail!

We Like To Be Listened To

Not to make too fine a point of it, but perhaps it's OUR aspirations that could do with being understood.

Also, what's good for the macro goose is good for the micro gander. 400 members of the public, including council staff, gathered outside County Hall in Norwich today to try and indicate to local councillors the strength of opposition to plans to cut millions from the budget in Norfolk. Councillors steadfastly refused to consider a raise in council tax as even being an option, and as a result it is Norfolk's most vulnerable people that will suffer. Still, who cares about them, right?

I hear today that Cameron has made £100 million pounds available to a Big Society Bank to sponsor local development projects. Two questions: firstly, where did this £100 million come from? Secondly, given the context of the mess this country is in, do we really need another fucking bank?!