(Sung to the tune of Fyfe Dangerfield's "Always A Woman To Me")
They'll devalue your pensions and close all your schools
You'll still vote for them, they think that you're fools
It's all about cuts, that's their philosophy
They don't care for the poor, it's their own fault they're in poverty.
You can give every hour, they'll work you for free
'Cos that is the point of Big Society
If they had their way, they would charge you to pee
They'll rob you like thieves, but that's always been Tories for me.
Oh, they'll look after their friends
They won't tax the banks
They just said that they might
Oh, how dare we suggest
To put it all right
They're in thrall to big business
They'll sell Royal Mail
They'll blame it on the Liberals when it all fails
They don't care about services, just the money
It's all about profits, but then, they are Tories, you see.
Oh, they'll take care of themselves
They get round the tax laws
They live where there's no crime
Oh, we forgave all their sins
Forgot what it was was like
When they were in the last time
They'll ride through your council estates like a lord
They'll put communities and jobs to the sword
They'll fiddle through fire and ignore the discord
'Cos the things that you need, they're just more things that we can't afford.
They may only reveal what they want you to see
Some may dress in yellow, but they are all Tories to me.